OUR INADEQUACY

I’ve been thinking about Paul’s surprising words:

·       For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing...For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. (Romans 7:18-19, 22-23 ESV)

“This must refer to Paul’s pre-Christian life,” I thought. However, reading on, I found that he was referring to his life in Christ:

·       Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. (Romans 7:24-25 ; Galatians 5:17)

These words are of great interest to me because they express the way I feel. Tonight, I was talking to a man who is writing about how meditation has been able to give him some measure of mind control and, with it, peace.

I admitted to him that I haven’t been able to master mind control. Worries, fears, impatience, and anxiety continue despite my faith and my efforts to implement it.

This has made me feel ashamed of myself and even my faith. However, I reminded myself of the time I endured a rollercoaster ride. I had faith that I’d get off alive but it certainly didn’t feel that way during this ordeal, as I screamed my way through every dip and turn. This illustrated the fact that it is possible to have faith but yet terror at the same time.

I continue to return to the words of Paul and of Jesus: “Without me, you can do nothing!” (John 15:5). So true! I often feel inadequate and helpless.

Why does our Lord leave us to endure such devastating feelings? Because He loves us and wants us to trust in Him EXCLUSIVELY! Peter described the process of faith purification:

·       In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. (1 Peter 1:6-7)

Peter compared the refinement of our faith to gold, something of far lesser value. Gold ore is melted in a cauldron. The impurities are released and rise to the surface so that they can be removed.

When we are subjected to the cauldron, our impurities rise to the surface so that they too can be observed and rejected. Through this process, we are humbled, as Paul had been through his thorn-in-the-flesh.

However, to make fine gold, this same process must be repeated many times.

If we are not repeatedly subjected to God’s cauldron, we become proud and begin to believe in our own sufficiency as Paul would have been without his own cauldron (2 Corinthians 3:5; 12:7-10). Peter returned to this same theme:

·       Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. (1 Peter 4:12-13).

Suffering not only causes us to despair of our own abilities but also causes us to long for the return of our blessed Redeemer.

As a result, when He does return, we will cry out “Yes.”