AGAINST TRIAL MARRIAGES (SHACKING -UP) FOR BELIEVERS

 

 

Even for Christians, trial-marriages have become widely acceptable, and few are preaching against it. Therefore, I thought it might be helpful for me to share my thoughts on the subject:

 

·       Having sex is almost the same as being married but without any commitment. It’s a matter of becoming one-flesh: 1 Corinthians 6:16: “Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.” This means that any sexual act should ideally be formalized in marriage. It’s that serious to God. Besides, those who postpone marriage, while shacking-up, have a bad statistical track record.

 

·       Most importantly, shacking-up is not faithful to God’s design. If they had been willing to take this step, why not also get married? Perhaps they are kidding themselves. Trial marriages were forbidden in Israel. If a couple were found having sex, they were to marry. Marriage is the only sexual institution the Bible sanctioned:

·       It is marriage that keeps the bed undefiled, not a trial marriage:  Hebrews 13:4 “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

 

·       There was never a hint in the Scriptures that a trial marriage could be used to satisfy sexual temptation: 1 Corinthians 7:2 “But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” This logic precluded a trial marriage.

 

·       Parents cannot take such a “union” seriously. It might negatively impact the relationships of everyone.

 

·       Good marriages often have a bad start. If you are shacking-up, there is less motivation to try to persevere and work things out. I think that this injures both parties, especially since at least one of the two had hopes for marriage.

 

·       A child might result and perhaps also an abortion. The impact of such a “family” is devastating for the children.

 

·       Even if they do eventually marry, it is a bad example for others.

 

·       If we allow shacking-up, then it is hard to stand against other sexual sins – divorce, adultery, LGBTQ. One compromise leads to another. Therefore, trial marriages open the floodgate to all forms of sexual perversion.