CONFRONTING THE SELF

 

 

Humanity is in denial about who they are. Why? We’d rather believe comforting things about ourselves rather than the threatening truth. Therefore, when we tell others that they are sinners who need the Savior, they react. Sometimes, they will say, “You have no right to tell me who I am. I already know who I am.” Therefore, I wrote:

 

The claim that we are normally self-deluded is something that has been confirmed by hundreds of psychological surveys and experiments. We are adept at suppressing into unconsciousness things we don’t want to see about ourselves. We prefer the comforts of darkness and self-deceit, as Jesus had taught:

 

·       “And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil. For everyone who does wicked things hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his works should be exposed.” (John 3:19-20)

 

I therefore “boast” that I am a “recovering lover of the darkness.” I still love to think comforting thoughts rather than correct thoughts about myself.

 

Why is humanity in denial? Simple - we want to be! Why do we wear self-protective masks to hide ourselves rather than just being transparent and non-defensive? Despite all of our attempts at denial and suppression of what we find shameful about ourselves, we still sense that there is something wrong with us. Therefore, we try to numb this sense with sex, substances, distractions, achievements, and the affirmations and “rewards” of society.

 

Denial and self-deceit also pertain to God. Why do we reject and hate the idea of a moral and righteous God? Because we know that we cannot live up to His righteous standards and feel condemned. Besides, we are unwilling to surrender our autonomy to Him. We’d rather remain the captain of our own ship, even if it is sinking.

 

Perhaps this is what hell is all about - God allowing us to have the darkness of our comforting self-delusions, even when it climaxes into eternal torment.

 

I hope and trust that you are emerging from this darkness, as painful as it might be, to face the light of truth. For me, this has only been possible with the assurance of God’s love. How else could I endure seeing my unworthiness!