LEARNING UNWORTHINESS

 

We are burdened with many weights—guilt, shame, worries, sins, regrets, and psychological needs to prove ourselves worthy and good. However, the Lord promises us freedom from a highly unlikely source—through believing the truth:

·       John 8:31–32 So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

However, the truth sometimes comes in unlikely and undesirable forms. Instead of trying to believe that we are worthy of God so that we can feel good about ourselves, Jesus instructed us to regard ourselves as unworthy and undeserving of anything good from Him:

·        Luke 17:10 “So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty.’”

The Bible is filled with such admonitions:

·       Galatians 6:3 For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.

James calls us a mere “mist” which disappears as the sun appears. As painful as it might be to regard ourselves as “something” insignificant, unworthiness is the path to something far more valuable. Paul had explained how he had to die to self-trust in his worthiness and superiority. If anyone had reasons to boast and exalt themselves, Paul had more. However, he learned to not trust in his performance but in Christ alone:

·       Philippians 3:7–9 But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith.

Although I had far less to trust in than Paul had, as a 15 year-old I would look in the mirror, flex my muscles, and give myself many positive affirmations: “I am wonderful and all the girls secretly love me.” However, my experience never supported my self-deceptions. Instead, it seemed that the girls preferred the athletes, the class-clowns, and even the bad boys.

My positive affirmations became an addiction, and I required an increasingly greater and grandiose fix. However, these delusions not only further alienated me from other others but also from myself. Who was I? I no longer could say, but self-righteousness, self-aggrandizement, and narcissism run our world. Jesus told a parable illustrating this:

·       Luke 18:9–14 He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and treated others with contempt: “Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

The effects of self-righteousness (narcissism) are costly. This practice is not simply a matter of self-exaltation but also of denigrating others. It’s always a matter of needing to prove that we are better than others and requires massive doses of self-delusion resulting in alienation. In the process, the Pharisee also became alienated from God, having chosen the darkness of self-deception over the truths of God.

However, the hated and unworthy tax collector confessed the truth about himself—his only hope was in the mercy of God, and his confession brought God’s blessings. In the following account we see how gratefulness and courage result from the knowledge of our unworthiness.

Knowing that she had been forgiven, a sinful woman boldly entered a fancy Pharisees’ home where she didn’t belong. She fell down at Jesus’ feet, shedding tears of gratefulness over them, and anointed them with costly oil. The Pharisee, who had invited Jesus to his exquisite luncheon, was thinking, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.”

The Pharisee considered himself worthy and the woman unworthy. However, Jesus explained how she had showed Him great love while the Pharisee failed to show Him any:

·       Luke 7:46–47 (NLT) “You neglected the courtesy of olive oil to anoint my head, but she has anointed my feet with rare perfume. I tell you, her sins—and they are many—have been forgiven, [in this way] she has shown me much love. But a person who is forgiven little shows only little love.”

The point isn’t that we should become great sinners so that we would be forgiven and become more loving. Instead, each of us has to realize that we are unworthy of God and desperately need His mercy.

Training In Unworthiness

The addiction to the deception of self-righteousness is perhaps the most destructive addiction. It is invisible. Therefore, no one says, I need to become less narcissistic. Nor does any psychologist advertise to cure self-righteousness. Instead, they too tend to feed it with positive affirmations. This is because no one wants to see what a wretch they have become. Instead, we’d prefer to think that we are always on the right/good side while others must change (Proverbs 16:2) . Therefore, our Lord must intervene to humble us. This can be so painful that many prefer suicide to humiliation. Here’s how it works:

 1.     Suffering

2.     Anger at God

3.  God Provides

4.    Humbled to See Our Unworthiness

5.    Reject Self-Trust in Favor of Trusting God According to His Word

Moses explained to the Israelites God’s strategy to humble them:

 ·       Deuteronomy 8:3 And he humbled you and let you hunger and fed you with manna, which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that he might make you know that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD.

He taught Israel to depend upon Him. He would feed their hunger with manna, which they must collect and eat exactly according to His directions. If they collected more than they needed, magots would come and create a stinking mess. Consequently, they learned that they would have to follow God’s every instruction rather than their own understanding or fears. He lovingly disciplined His children so that they would learn to trust in Him instead of their own reasoning and desires:

King David admitted that he needed the Lord’s chastening:

·       Psalm 119:67, 71–72 Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word…It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statutes. The law of your mouth is better to me than thousands of gold and silver pieces.

I too need to be afflicted to learn to trust in God rather than in myself. Years ago, I had been asked to preach at a church. Halfway through, I utterly forgot what I was going to say next and tried to cover it up by rambling on. The humiliation was so intense that I will never forget it. However, this lesson taught me to remember to pray before I act.

Our Savior purposely created us in a way to show us that we are unworthy and dependent upon Him:

·       2 Corinthians 4:7-11 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.  

Our hardships are designed to expose our unworthiness as melting gold ore brings its impurities to the surface. The gold is then refined as the impurities are removed. Nor can we look down on others, as the Jews, even Jesus’ disciples, had been prone to do regarding the Gentiles:

·       Matthew 15:21–28 [With His disciples] Jesus went away from there and withdrew to the district of Tyre and Sidon. And behold, a Canaanite woman from that region came out and was crying, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David [Messiah]; my daughter is severely oppressed by a demon.” But he did not answer her a word. And his disciples came and begged him, saying, “Send her away, for she is crying out after us.” He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” But she came and knelt before him, saying, “Lord, help me.” And he answered, “It is not right to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.” She said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters’ table.” Then Jesus answered her, “O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed instantly.

Jesus was teaching His Apostles a valuable object-lesson using the Gentile woman. First, He wouldn’t answer her to embolden His Apostles to demand that Jesus send the Gentile away. Jesus then referred to the Gentiles as “dogs.” The Apostles must have rejoiced to hear this Word, as it was what they had always believed! However, the woman responded with such wisdom of humility that Jesus proclaimed “great is your faith”—something that He had never said to His own Apostles. Humiliation to the max! (Also see Matthew 8:8-10)

Knowing it’s all about Jesus

Once we are willing to embrace our unworthiness, Jesus become our worthiness:

·       1 Corinthians 1:30–31 And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.”

We then begin to understand that Jesus is all we need and delight that He is our freedom and life:

·       Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.

Many will scorn such words. However, for me, these truths have become my absolute delight.