WHY DO GOOD?

I asked an atheist, “Why do you practice virtue if you don’t believe that there is such a thing as an objective moral law?” He answered very candidly:

• I live virtuously because of what it does for me. It provides psychological rest, enabling me to feel good about myself. It also improves my relationships.

Although this is true, I tend to think that his pursuit of virtue carries some deadly cargo. How? It seems like our pursuit of virtue is contaminated by our all-too-human desire for significance or righteousness. In “The Significant Life,” attorney George M. Weaver identifies the ubiquitous drive to establish our self-importance:

• Individual humans are not concerned so much about the survival of the species as they are about their personal survival or significance. In order to push ourselves beyond our confining space-time limits, we as individuals try to set ourselves apart from the rest of humanity. It is unsettling to admit that one is average or ordinary – a routine person. (7)

Weaver documents this in many ways:

• Salvador Dali once said, “The thought of not being recognized [is] unbearable”…Lady Gaga sings, “I live for the applause, applause, applause…the way that you cheer and scream for me.” She adds in another song, “yes we live for the Fame, Doin’ it for the Fame, Cuz we wanna live the life of the rich and famous.” (7)

Perhaps one reason we never achieve our longed-for significance is that it always comparative. We need to be more significant or to have more recognition than the next guy. Writer Gore Vidal had been very transparent about this:

• “Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies.” (58)

Eventually, its seems that this drive to establish our significance/righteousness tears at friendship, dividing instead of bringing together. The jealousy displayed by comedian Al Jolson is also reflective of the human condition:

• According to his biographer, “He once had a team of performing elephants fired because he thought the audience liked them too much.” (59)

Trying to achieve our worth, significance, or even virtuousness can become brutal and abusive. When life is about maintaining our “psychological rest” or our “good feelings” about ourselves, we can do some destructive things to ensure that these “good feelings” continue.

And it doesn’t seem to matter how successful, important, or honored we become, we always want more. The richest man in the world, John D. Rockefeller, was asked how much more money he would need to be happy. He answered, “Always a little bit more,” demonstrating that humanity is in pursuit of an unattainable goal.

In “Fame, The Psychology of Stardom,” psychologists Evans and Wilson argue:

• What we try to create… is some illusion of permanence. The desire for permanence drives people to carve their name on trees and rocks, just like the handprints on Hollywood Boulevard. We need to have an impact on life – to leave something behind us when we go. (19)

It is not enough for us to simply enjoy what we have. Our quest for “psychological rest” demands us “to leave something behind us when we go.” We even have to convince ourselves that we are leaving more behind than others. Weaver cites President Lyndon B. Johnson as an example of this:

• According to one commentator, “It is a curious footnote to history that long before he ran into trouble, Johnson had turned central Texas into a living monument to his heritage and his journey to the summit (the L.B.J birthplace, the L.B.J. boyhood home, the L.B.J. state park, the L.B.J. ranch and more).” (22)

The craving to be a somebody – to feel good about oneself - takes many forms besides the pursuit of virtue. It can embrace virtue or even vice. Weaver writes about other attempts to leave one’s mark on the world:

• In 2005 Joseph Stone torched a Pittsfield, Massachusetts apartment building… After setting the blaze, Stone rescued several tenants from the fire and was hailed as a hero. Under police questioning, Stone admitted, however, that he set the fire and rescued the tenants because, as summarized at trial by an assistant district attorney, he “wanted to be noticed, he wanted to be heard, he wanted to be known.” (44)

Evidently, this drive for significance is so powerful that it can overrule the moral dictates of conscience. One mass-murderer gunman explained in his suicide note, “I’m going to be f_____ famous.” (45)

This perverted drive for significance can even override all other affections. On December 8, 1980, Mark David Chapman, a zealous fan of the Beatle, John Lennon, first obtained his idol’s autograph before gunning him down. He explained:

• “I was an acute nobody. I had to usurp someone else’s importance, someone else’s success. I was  ‘Mr. Nobody’ until I killed the biggest Somebody on earth.” At his 2006 parole hearing, he stated: “The result would be that I would be famous, the result would be that my life would change and I would receive a tremendous amount of attention, which I did receive… I was looking for reasons to vent all that anger and confusion and low self-esteem.” (47) 

By attaching himself to fame of another, Chapman was able to elevate himself. Was it “low self-esteem” or merely Chapman’s way to achieve what everyone else is trying to achieve – importance and self-value? Weaver adds that:

• More than two hundred people confessed in 1932 to the kidnapping and murder of the infant son of famed aviator Charles Lindbergh. (50)

If we fail to be famous, at least we might have a crack at being infamous by attaching ourselves to fame. Could this pursuit for significance also explain why females throw themselves at the Rock Stars and the rich and famous? After all, we do not seek autographs bums but from the successful and the famous. Why? This elevate us, adding to our importance? (I like to boast that Charlie Manson had been my roommate for a few days!)  

And doesn’t our craving for recognition, even for immortality, also find its more common expression among people-pleasers? Isn’t this just another way - through the esteem of others - that we achieve significance? And then we become resentful and jealous when we fail to obtain this desired commodity.

I’m suggesting that all of these drives for worthiness, recognition, approval, significance, moral adequacy, success, and even for negative notoriety are connected. But what is the common glue or the underlying cause that gives rise to these various manifestations of the drive for adequacy? Underneath, we feel morally inadequate, unworthy, and insignificant and, therefore, try to compensate for this nagging awareness. We experience guilt and shame and try to cover these destabilizing feelings with the tokens of success and significance – applause and approval. We wear designer clothing to cover up our sense of inadequacy. And when we are bested in our quest, we feel diminished as did Gore Vidal by the success of his friends.

Do we feel morally threatened? Is our sense of adequacy and worthiness threatened when we fail to live up to our moral standards? Yes! This would suggest that we are not born with a blank moral slate but a parchment filled with moral laws. In “Mere Christianity,” C.S. Lewis observed that even the atheist cannot escape the moral law that has been written on his heart:

• Whenever you find a man who says he does not believe in a real Right and Wrong, you will find the same man going back on this a moment later. He may break his promises to you, but if you try breaking one to him he will be complaining, “It’s not fair.”

Even though the atheist does not acknowledge an objective moral law, he inescapably acts as if he does. One evidence of this is the defensive excuses we make when we are accused of doing wrong:

• If we do not believe in decent behavior, why should we be so anxious to make excuses for not having behaved decently? The truth is we believe in decency so much—we feel the Rule of Law pressing on us so—that we cannot bear to face the fact that we are breaking it, and consequently we try to shift the responsibility.

We also compensate for our sense of moral inadequacy by trying to live a virtuous life, even if we don’t believe in the independent existence of virtue. I am not suggesting that there is anything wrong with this. However, if we are pursuing virtue for the wrong reasons – primarily to prove that we are good and morally adequate people – it will backfire on us and everyone around us. It will also make us intolerably self-righteous if we deem ourselves successful at proving our adequacy.

Instead, virtue must be pursued for virtue sake and not because it elevates us for the moment. (Often, the drug that elevates will also bring us crashing down.)

But why were we created to be obsessively driven to achieve significance and moral adequacy? We weren’t! We were created in such perfection that the first human couple went naked without any shame. What happened? They rebelled against God and refused to confess their sin. And this became the ultimate moral and relational Big Bang. It blew us apart from our life-sustaining relationship with our Maker where achieving significance had never been an issue. We were, therefore, banished into the very state of autonomy that we had so longed for and have been suffering ever since, awaiting the return of our Creator-Savior-Healer.

Frustration and Inadequacy

Frustration is not simply the result of failing to accomplish a task. It is also a product of our expectations. If we expect that we have what it takes to accomplish a task, we will be frustrated and feel inadequate when we fail. We might also become angry with those who refuse to comply with our plan.

Our expectations also involve others, society, and government. When they fail to meet our expectations, we might also feel helpless, inadequate, overwhelmed, frustrated and angry. However, we do not live in a just world. We live in a world where everyone is pursuing their own interests, and these are often contrary to our own.

How are we to live with these frustrations? Firstly, we have to recognize how limited and small we are. We can barely change ourselves, let alone those around us. In fact, Jesus informed His disciples that “without me, you can do nothing.” Surprisingly, He confessed, “The Son can do nothing by himself” (John 5:19). Paul confessed that, although God had given him a great ministry, he was inadequate:

• Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God. (2 Corinthians 3:5; ESV) 

This understanding didn’t come naturally to Paul. He had to come to a point of self-despair before he could truly trust in God (2 Cor. 1:8-9). This is a lesson I need to relearn a thousand times. The Lord is showing me that I cannot trust in my intellect, teachings, or writings to change anyone. The more I do, the more conflict I experience.

How do we cope with our inadequate lives and this increasingly menacing world? Only by keeping our eyes on our Savior! The Psalmist wisely wrote:

• Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. (Psalm 37:1-7) 

This is not a resignation to failure and evil. Instead, it is a recognition that we need our Lord’s help every step of the way! He alone is our hope!

The Bible as God’s Word: A Little Bit of Proof

Many ask me to prove that the Bible is God’s Word. Not wanting to downplay the evidence, I usually say:

• Well, there many types of proof – fulfilled prophecy, miracles, changed lives and societies, wisdom, internal and external consistency, and the very nature of the Bible.

This usually elicits a burst of invectives. However, if the inquirer seems serious, I might attempt to share with them one family of proofs. One of my favorites is the wisdom of Scripture – how it provides us with the very truths we need to navigate this often exasperating sojourn we call “life.” It’s a wisdom intelligently designed to optimally meet our needs and those of society. Here are just a few of the many examples of how Scripture psychologically gave me exactly what I needed.

I am always second-guessing myself, wondering, “Did I say the right thing? ...Did I say it with the wrong motives? … Could I have said it more effectively?” Although this perfectionistic preoccupation can promote self-improvement, it can also drive us crazy. I needed to lay it aside before it laid me out, and the Holy Spirit did this for me through applying Scripture to my life:

• I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)

What a relief! My failures were no longer my own. They belonged to my Savior who promised that He would work all things for my good (Rom. 8:28), even my worst failures and nightmares, my worst humiliations! I was now free to fail. Not that failures no longer hurt, but I now know who will lift me out of my discouragement (1 Cor. 10:12-13), and He has proved this to me repeatedly. Consequently, Biblical truth allows me to constructively face my challenges without being overwhelmed by them.

We are also self-obsessed with questions of our goodness and worthiness. One of the greatest threats to our psychological well-being is the dread of not being worthy. This might take the form of a deep and abiding sense of shame, insecurity or inadequacy. We might even worry that we are not even worthy of God. Therefore, it is such a relief to realize that none of us are worthy. We are all sinners who need the Savior:

• "There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one." (Romans 3:10-12) 

This had certainly been true of me. Even though I attempted to suppress this truth of my moral inadequacy before God, it would continue to resurface to my great shame. I tried to beat back the ugly truth with assertions that I was really a good and loving person. I was engaged in a costly war with myself, and the result was desperation and depression.

Instead of deriving my sense of worthiness or adequacy from myself, I needed to find it from another source, and Scripture informed me that Jesus is that source:

• God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. (2 Cor. 5:21) 

I could begin to accept the fact that I am entirely unworthy, because, in the eyes of my Savior, I am now entirely righteous. I could now face the once-shaming truths about myself and take responsibility for my behavior, because I have been assured of my ultimate worth before Him!

My wife can now charge me with being insensitive, and I can readily apologize. We’re restored! Others can regard me as unworthy, but that’s okay because I am now defined, not by what others might think, but by what my Savior thinks.

For the longest time, I had been feeling condemned. Even after Christ came into my life, I still had that sense. My feelings were so forceful that everything else – even Scripture – appeared as merely hollow words in comparison. I felt that even God condemned me! Finally, however, Scripture broke through, took hold of my self-contempt and torn it apart, like a lion tearing apart red meat. What a consolation it has been to learn that:

• Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 8:1) 

This taught me conclusively that my feelings of condemnation and rejection had nothing to do with God rejecting me, but just my own aberrant reactions! I could now laugh at these once terrifying feelings, knowing that they have nothing to do with my ultimate status! It’s like receiving a letter saying that there has been a warrant issued for your arrest. However, upon reading it more closely, you find that the letter is actually addressed to someone else.

Many say, “Well, I’m glad Christ worked for you, but many find consolation through psychotherapy.” I didn’t. I had seen five highly recommended psychologists, and each left me worse off that I was before.

Yes, they all affirmed that I was “okay,” but I could never believe them. I knew what my feelings were telling me, and they talked with a greater authority than the psychologists. I just knew I wasn’t “okay.”

Besides, their affirmations rolled off my back as if it was made of Teflon. Perhaps this was because I had been giving myself false affirmations all my life. I told myself I was the greatest but actually felt that I was the least. After a while, these affirmations became no more than an addiction. I needed them but got little out of them. However, having believed them – and this distorted my thinking and perceptions - they alienated me from reality, wisdom, and honest relationship. Because I perceived the world through my distorted self-affirmations, I also regarded others through this grid. They were either superior or inferior to me. If they were seen as “superior,” I resented them. If “inferior,” I disdained them.

However, these affirmations bore little resemblance to reality, while I subsequently found that the Biblical affirmations brought me in touch with a deeper reality. Now, perceiving myself as an object of God’s mercy, I began to regard others with mercy.

Besides, our sense of okay-ness requires more than the affirmation of other people. They all say different things, and every experience - every success and every failure – sings a different song. Which was I to believe? Therefore, to base my worth on either the opinions of others or on my socially approved accomplishments meant that my worth was like the stock market – booming, crashing, and the cause of constant instability and insecurity.

Not only does Scripture tell us what to believe, it tells us what to avoid. It is not simply that certain acts are regarded as “sin.” These acts also destroy. Sin is worse than eating junk food. The latter just destroys the body. Sin destroys everything about us. It contaminates our thinking and passions (Rom. 1:21-32). For one thing, as a result of sin, we carry around unresolved guilt and shame. We even project our shame and self-contempt on others, convinced that others regard us in the same way we feel about ourselves. However, Scripture relieves us of these blinding burdens we carry:

• If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives. (1 John 1:9-10) 

Instead, we often try to cover over this problem with a variety of palliatives – successes, sex, drugs, popularity. However, there is nothing that gives the relief and cleansing the way that confession does.

What makes the affirmations of Scripture so powerful – so life transforming? For one thing, they illuminate what had been shadowy and confusing. Once I began to understand myself in its light, I found that I began to understand others. With the assurance of God’s love and forgiveness, I could begin to face myself. As I saw my needs and insecurities – I had previously run from these and denied them – I could also see those of other people. As I began to face my denials and rationalizations, I began to understand the same defensive maneuverings I saw in others. As I received God’s compassion for me, I could more readily extend it to others.

While Scripture is foolishness and contemptible to the one whose eyes haven’t been opened (1 Cor. 2:14), it is the scalpel in the hand of the Holy Spirit. It cuts deeply to remove malignant tumors (Heb. 4:12) – attitudes and ideas that fail to accord with holiness. Such cuts are always painful (Heb. 12:5-11), but they identify and remove cancers that threaten well-being. They expose jealousy. However, they also provide the perfect antidote:

• All things are yours, whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas or the world or life or death or the present or the future--all are yours. (1 Cor. 3:21-22)

In light of God’s assurances that He wants to eternally give us the world, jealousy had to take a back seat. And I had been jealous, even of the spiritual successes of others, convinced that they would receive heavenly reward and recognition, and I wouldn’t. However, Scripture assures us that all of God’s people are one, and “all things” would be ours. We had become joint heirs with our Savior (Rom. 8:17).

This is just what I needed to know. This truth stomped all the vitality out of my jealousy. I now rejoice as others rejoice!

Westerners have invented a new god, a god who is non-judgmental and non-punitive. Momentarily, this god might feel comfortable. However, once we have suffered victimization, our thoughts turn to justice, even revenge. Therefore, it is so liberating to know that we have a God who cares deeply about justice:

• If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink” [ Proverbs 25]…Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:18-21)

It is only because we have the assurance that God will bring justice (also through the legal systems He has ordained – Rom. 13:1-4) that we can devote ourselves to love. It is also because we know the undeserved love of God for us! Without this knowledge, revenge would become a way of life.

When I read about the estimated 170,000 Christians being murdered yearly simply because they are Christians, I want to grab a machine gun or suicide belt and right the wrongs. But my Lord informs me that He has a better way. He’ll deal with it! Instead, I should pray, love my enemies, and address the wrongs with righteous means. How liberating and personally enhancing!

This represents just a small sampling of the ways that God and His truth has infiltrated to bring us new life. Volumes can be written on this subject. Jesus had taught:

• "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32)

Not only has He set us free from sin and its various penalties. He has also set us free from so many things that have kept me in prison – fears, lusts, rationalizations, denials, addiction to self-affirmations, and many forms of self-deceptions.

Dissatisfaction with Self and Delight with our Savior

Are you dissatisfied with yourself? I certainly am! Today, I read a newsletter from an ex-gay who works with people having various forms of sexual dysfunction. He wrote:

• Why is it that we are more easily moved to anger rather than tears over the state of things in this world? Why is it that we can quickly, in a nanosecond, go to mad – instead of sad?

He then contrasted this moral failure with Jesus who wept over the very Jerusalem which was about to crucify him.

I grieve that I do little weeping for the plight of others. I wish I did more – far more. I wish that I ached about their eternal destiny. Instead, I slide into anger with the ease of a mad dog barking, while compassion is a fleeting as a cool breeze under the July Mississippi sun.

This makes me feel very inadequate, but I should feel this way. This is because I am inadequate and unworthy of anything from above. However, few realize their inadequacy. Oddly, it was a Roman commander who understood his inadequacy better than anyone else! He had asked Jesus to heal his servant, but then told Him that he was unworthy that Jesus should even enter into his home. Instead, he wisely suggested that Jesus only needs to speak the word and his servant would be healed. The commander explained that he only needs to speak the word to his subordinates and things get done. The commander reasoned that if he – a mere man - had such authority, Jesus had even more to heal. Consequently:

• When Jesus heard this, he was astonished and said to those following him, "I tell you the truth, I have not found anyone in Israel with such great faith.” (Matthew 8:10)

I feel bad about my many personal failures, but Jesus reminds me that we are all inadequate – all unworthy of anything from Him. He also reminds me that this inadequacy doesn’t really matter, because He is our Savior. He even claims that when we realize our utter need and unworthiness, this becomes a source of great blessing:

• "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.” (Matthew 5:3-5)

Therefore, I need not punish myself for my moral failures. He has paid the price for all of them:

• God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. (2 Cor. 5:21)

This doesn’t mean that we should be complacent or cavalier about our lack of love and compassion. We mourn over it and cry out for our Savior’s help, but we rejoice that it’s now all about Him, not us:

• I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. (Galatians 2:20)

We also trust that He will compensate for our moral poverty:

• If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? (Romans 8:31-32)

This understanding should free us up to turn our eyes away from the depressing sight of who we really are and to re-focus our red eyes on Him alone! What a relief!