I have a negative lens. This means that I remember my most
painful memories. I am also highly critical. This can play out badly in a
marriage, where we tend to react negatively to our spouse. Consequently, I
become irritable, impatient, and impatient. I tend to forget the many blessings
of my marriage and focus on the inevitable frustrations.
Therefore, I’ve been asking the Lord to correct my lens -
how I regard my blessing, my wife. Consequently, I am now beginning to see her
as a fragrant rose, a delight to my eyes and senses.
However to flourish, roses need tender care. This requires
some effort, because men tend to be more self-centered than their nurturing
wives. This should not surprise us if we have been reading and meditating on
our Scriptures:
• Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and
gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the
washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself
in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and
without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own
bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own
flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church.
(Ephesians 5:25-29 ESV)
Women are not instructed to love their husbands. This comes
naturally to them, as the delicate and beautiful roses that they are. However,
we husbands must not stifle them by placing our rose in a dark place without
watering them. Instead, it is wonderful to see them spring to life as we treat
them with the same care as we would treat ourselves.
If we do this, we will begin to see them as a creation of
great beauty and to once again delight in our wives.
How foolish it is to plant roses only to allow the weeds to
overcome them. This is how it is when we allow ourselves to become irritated
with God’s beautiful creation.
It takes so little effort to weed our roses. When we do
this, we can delight in them once again.
I used to grow a garden. When I was able to upkeep my
garden, it was my delight to visit it. Once I surrendered it to the weeds, I no
longer wanted to see it. It only reminded me of my failure to nurture it.
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