God is truth, as Jesus had proclaimed: “I am the way, the
truth, and the life...” ( John 14:6). This fact requires us to also live in the
Light of God’s truth, however painful our exposure to the truth:
·
Behold, you delight in truth in the inward
being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart. (Psalm 51:6)
However, so much of the advice of the self-help movement has
demeaned truth in favor of positive self-talk: “Believe in yourself,” “Trust in
your feelings,” “You can succeed at whatever you try”... Whether such advice has
anything to do with truth was secondary to building confidence and self-esteem.
However, I think we see some indications that truth is
making a comeback among some mental health professionals. For example, business
mentor, speaker, and podcast host, Lauren Saunders, has written that positivity
has a negative side when not grounded in emotional truth:
·
Hurting people “want to create abundant lives
and desired outcomes, they [reason that they] can’t have too much doubt, fear,
or uncertainty. It’s essentially an attempt to bypass the emotions that make us
human, to only focus on the ‘good’, and to live in a perpetual state of
monitoring our every thought and emotion so that we only attract what we want.”
·
“There are no ‘good’ or ‘bad’ emotions, only the
stories we assign to how we feel, and what those feelings mean about us and our
capacity to live fulfilled and happy lives.” https://www.theladders.com/career-advice/denying-sadness-anxiety-and-doubt-are-forms-of-toxic-positivity-that-arent-helping-you
We can learn from our emotions. They teach us valuable
lessons. To suppress and deny them does not eliminate them. Instead, we might
even empower them as they operate freely in our subconscious and emerge in
confusing ways.
To successfully manage our lives requires us to see our
problems as they really are. We wouldn’t try to clean our dishes or cook
ravioli if we blindfold ourselves. Instead, we must see the task as it really
is.
Toxic positivity also undermines relationships. It is not as
satisfying to relate to a mask, a facade, as it is to relate to a genuine,
self-accepting person. The positivity mask undermines any sense of connection
with the other person. Nor does it facilitate relational problem solving.
Counseling’s goal should be to uncover the truth. Listening
and probing demonstrates caring and helps our friend to realize that
self-discovery is important, even to your friend.
Truth was central to Jesus’ ministry:
·
“If you abide in my word, you are truly my
disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John
8:31-32)
Truth must be central to our own ministry. Truth starts with
the knowledge of God, but it also includes the knowledge of ourselves and our
neediness of the Savior.
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