It is hard enough to deal with our painful and prolonged trials. However, we tend to complicate matters when we interpret our pain and frustration to mean that God doesn’t love us enough.
What makes matters worse it that we’ve been praying for
years for something that is clearly consistent with God’s will – for instance,
an emotional healing that would conform us more perfectly into Christ’s image.
Consequently, we find ourselves struggling with two things:
- The painful trial and
- Our resulting doubts about God.
The first issue is complex. Even though it clearly is our
God’s will to conform us into the likeness of His Son – and this He is always
performing (Rom. 8:28; Phil. 1:6) – He also uses our weaknesses and infirmities
to accomplish this (2 Cor. 12:7-10). Surprisingly, He informs us that “when we
are weak, it is then that we are strong [in Him].
Consequently, we don’t know if a particular healing is
consistent with God’s will, and if it is, when He will do something about it.
However, it is certain that we will all die without receiving all of our prayed-for healings. We will continue
to struggle against sin until His return (Gal. 5:17; Rom. 7:25). Life isn’t
supposed to be too comfortable here. If it was, we wouldn’t cry out, “Come
quickly Lord Jesus.”
The answer to the second issue is more important and more
straight-forward. Hardships, even the most intense forms, aren’t proof of God’s
displeasure. If anything, they represent the opposite:
·
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating
you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?...Our fathers
disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us
for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant
at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of
righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. (Hebrews
12:7-11)
(I know that you are aware of these things, but sometimes it
is helpful to here them from someone else.) Job was the most righteous man on
the entire earth, yet God subjected him to the greatest trials. Paul would
become the greatest missionary the church has ever known, but God promised that
he would have to suffer profoundly, saying:
·
“I will show him how much he must suffer for my
name." (Acts 9:16)
Suffering is not a sign of God’s displeasure. King David was
arguably Israel’s
greatest king and a man after God’s own heart. Nevertheless, he suffered
greatly. We need only to read the Psalms to see this.
For years, I experienced intense doubt about God’s love for
me. I suspected that even if I did make it into heaven, God would only open the
doors to me reluctantly. Therefore, I would become the heavenly street-sweeper.
I felt as if I was displeasing to Him. I had become keenly aware of my own
sins, and so it seemed very plausible to me that I couldn’t be one of His
favorites. Clearly, I deserved nothing from Him. As a result, I resented those
who I suspected were in His better graces.
What changed? I think that the real change came from God
making the truths of His Word very real to me. And as these verses (and others)
illuminate for me, I cried copious tears of joy and relief:
·
Galatians 2:20:
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives
in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who
loved me and gave himself for me.
·
Romans 8:1: Therefore, there is now no
condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,
·
John 6:37: All that the Father gives me will come
to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away.
·
Ephes. 3:17-19: And I pray that you, being rooted
and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp
how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this
love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the
fullness of God.
There were also many other verses that spoke to through the
tsunamis of depression. They assured me that our Savior is truly who He said He
is, and that makes all the difference in the world. I trust that as you
continue to seek Him, He will likewise deliver you.
Although knowing who God is is almost everything, it isn’t
everything. There is the knowledge of God, but there is also God Himself. If
knowledge alone could deliver, we would find little need for God! This would
tend to create arrogance and self-sufficiency. Therefore, He requires that we
wait patiently for deliverance:
·
I am still confident of this: I will see the
goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong
and take heart and wait for the Lord. (Psalm 27:13-14)
Waiting is a constant reminder that it’s not about us – not
even merely about our faith and knowledge – it’s about our merciful Lord!
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