HOPE, MARRIAGE, AND THE LIGHT

I spend too much time and effort trying to analyze my feelings, reactions, and responses. Instead, I think that there are many questions about our formative influences that will remain hidden from sight even with the help of the best psychotherapists.

Nevertheless, we are required to examine ourselves to see if our thoughts and actions measure up to Scripture. I might be perplexed about my distaste for my neighbor. However, instead of trying to figure out why, I must examine myself to see if I am treating him with love. I might never be sure of the source of my distaste, and I don't need to be. I only need to be Jesus to him.

This principle is even more important when it comes to our wives and husbands with whom we experience a variety of negative reactions. We are perplexed about many of them and their severity. 

If we are really troubled about them, we tend to obsessively analyze them but find that this brings little relief. Even worse, this obsession deflects our attentions from what really matters - applying Scripture.

This might sound strange to you, but I find such relief by letting Scripture judge me. It is as if Christ is telling me, "This is the way you must go," and I experience peace and renewed hope.

What does this look like? I read a verse like:

• Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. (1 Peter 3:7; NIV)

I am convicted, see the consequences of my sin, confess, and find relief, charity, and hope. I also need continual reminding, like from this passage:

• Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her...In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. (Ephesians 5:25, 28)

What blessing is derived when we walk in the Light, what hope and reassurance! And how vigilant we must be to remain in the Light.

Please understand that I am not making light of your relational struggles nor the resulting pain. It might represent an ongoing affliction. However, our Lord promises a "way of escape" as we continue to commit our way to Him.